Friday, September 13, 2013

Full Disclosure (almost)

Sorry I am late posting!  Life is full! I just returned from having lunch and shopping with my oldest daughter who is away at college about 1 1/2 hrs away. As I returned home, I snapped a few shots (texting while driving is illegal but they have not outlawed snapping pics while driving... yet!). 

Driving on the OPEN road and enjoying views of the OPEN sky! Wish I had thought of that sooner!!!!

Anyway, in the few years since we began this group, we all have found that one of our Tangled Textile challenges tends to speak to us more than some of the others and creative juices just flow.  However, since last summer I have had a lot of difficulty producing finished work for our challenges,  much less any art at all. It has been really frustrating!! In years past, making art had been a creative outlet.... an activity that I enjoyed. But it seems that recently when I do finally come up with ideas, I have had a particularly difficult time getting anything on the page or the fabric.

For our latest challenge, I actually began a project (#1), got some technique ideas from a book, enlarged the "pattern", cut out all the fabric parts and began arranging them.  But as I looked at the work-in-progress on my studio floor (where else?)

..and it sat there for a few weeks (!), I could not complete it... so it was tossed.
Discouraged and running short on time....I perused my photos. Project possibility #2 never really got off the ground but involved one of my favorite photos from this summer. 

And then amid the chaos of my mind and my heart, an idea was born. However, this idea which involved a weekend (last weekend to be exact!) of hand dyeing, hand applique, machine sketching, embellishing .... meant that I would be exposing a part of my life that I have kept private FOREVER....
Merriam Webster defines exposed as, "1. open to view, 2. not shielded or protected."
But I kept working on project #3 because my heart said, "sew what you know." 

What I know is depression.... since I was about 12 years old.  Over the many years, I have been prescribed a variety of medications, I have graced the couches of psychologists, social workers, psychiatrists, a mental health worker at a student health center, and various counselors in many cities. I have read books about self-acceptance, hope, healing, agreements and I still have many more books to read. And yet, for some reason,  melancholy hangs on.

And sew I am......

Well, it is not quite done!

So I will post again when it is complete!


  1. Oh, lisa, so poignant and you know I have been in the same place, so you know I mean it. i have had the same trouble this year as well, but I also know if i didn't have you all I would just sink into it. you have captured the brain turmoil and confusion exactly. lots of lovexxx

  2. Lisa, not having experienced what you so eloquently described, your piece portrays how difficult it must be for you amidst the turmoil. You have OPENED yourself and I send you hugs in return.

  3. Well Lisa, I hear you, it’s one of the reasons I stepped back from this group after all. I have learned to accept myself most of the days and I try to find happiness in all I work on. The challenges were giving me too much stress. I applaud you for persevering! I’m sure you will finish this piece with the well known Lisa elegance!

  4. I can't imagine what it is like for you, Lisa, but I, too, applaud you. I think this piece is another beautiful example of the creative work you do. Your hand dyes are gorgeous - such beautiful colours, and you've portrayed some of what you go through in a wonderful manner - I can see your turmoil, but at the same time, the wonderful colours are far from melancholy, they express hope to me. Maybe this exposure, this opening of yourself, may be the beginning of a break from the melancholy - we do do our best work when it comes from what we know, hugs, J

  5. Expressing what you know certainly has created a beautiful and powerful piece of art! Your fabrics, colours and composition are beautiful and compelling. I hope that with your disclosure and conveying through your quilt what you feel and have experienced you'll find more resolution than what you've found in the past. Admiration and hugs.

  6. Lisa, my heart goes out to you. I've not experienced what you so eloquently describe, but I have worked with people facing similar struggles,so I know from that how difficult it can be. I applaud your courage in using this to inform your art, and hope that the creative process can play a part in your healing.

    Your colors are vibrant, you have certainly expressed what is on your heart in a away that draws the viewer in. I look forward to seeing the completed piece.